while they did live happily ever after

Quark: WERE YOU REALLY [GOING TO POST THIS CONVERSATION] I
I AM WEIRDLY FLATTERED?
oh well i have it on my phone
this conversation is weirdly long and involved
i type it ALL

[IT STARTS with her telling me to eat before having any serious conversations with WP]

jade: Ha ha ha. I told him I slept in late because I might need the extra energy for inkpot throwing. But you are right. Besides, there's still like five and a half hours before he comes home.

quark: Oh. Yes. Well then. Warn him to guard his right hand, just in case.

jade: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA luckily I do not think he actually has a saber. ...brb now I have to go check.

quark: Hahaha. Hey, you can be flexible. Kitching knives, butter knives, rusty shivs...

jade: oooooooo shivs. That's quite brilliant.

quark: You may thank my vast and encyclopedic knowledge of prison movies. Which is comprised solely of shawshank redemption.

jade: Hahahahahahahahahaha oh man I haven't even seen that one all the way. Or even a little bit. Oops.

quark: I have seen it twice. See: encoclypedic knowledge.

jade: Ah yes, clearly that is enough to catch all the nuances.

quark: And more they DIDN'T EVEN INTEND.

jade: OSNAP. clearly you are a prison MASTER.

quark: NO. NOT A MASTER. A WARDEN.

jade: ...DID THE OTHER PRISONERS TAINT YOU.
jade: /is shot

quark: That sounds so dirty.
quark: AS YOU SHOULD BE.

jade: Exactly. /lightning'd

quark: A bolt from the blue! (Not superman)

jade: ...Wonder Woman?

quark: Idk. apparently she's super into b**** HahahahHAHAHAHA SPEECH TO TEXT CENSORS BONDAGE

jade: ARE YOU SERIOUS OMG I AM LAUGHING SO HARD

quark: Let's see what else! b**** sex sexy kinky b*** s*** f*** damn it dom sub relationship
quark: bastard b**
quark: The B ones, by the way, are bondage, bdsm, and bitch

jade: What's the four-letter b word?
jade: IT CENSORS BDSM.

quark: I KNOW. Letters!
quark: Also I am whispering these so quietly I'm surprised it can hear it

jade: It's impressive on so many levels. Like who even thought about that, much less to censor it?
[redacted]

quark: ...i got that text four times.
jade: sorry thi WHAT IS THIS
YOU READ THE HAWKE FIC?
THE CLUMSY HAWKE FIC?
MY CLUMSY HAWKE FIC?
NNNNGH WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE SO I CAN GRILL YOU

I did not actually say that she said that I think what I said was my phone told me my text didn’t send, except apparently it did, and then I told her that clumsy!Hawke was making my day and apparently that distracted her. I am not sure if this conversation had a funnier conclusion! So we’ll just leave Quark’s distracted shock as a testament to her short attention span.

♥

and my grass/psychic deck is whuping her water/electric deck's butt.






brb relivin' the childhood i never had







eta: VICTORY, BITCHES.

Goose just finished Rebel Angels and now she is reading The Sweet Far Thing and she keeps asking me questions that just supports my suspicion that I need to reread that trilogy. Oops!

I showed the SyFy Alice to Quark and she liked it! I got to be ~*~mysterious~*~ and withhold information from her, which drives her crazy, because she likes to know she won't be disappointed and I don't believe in spoilers. THIS IS WHY WE ARE BEST FRIENDS: ULTIMATE COMPATIBILITY.

( books other people got me )

( other things I got, or, One Day I Will Master the 'List' Instead of the 'Block Paragraph' )

Anyway let's see OH I also saw Tangled with my sisters, anyone want to discuss? I know Jak did over at her LJ. I should do that.

OH OH OH I FINISHED ARIEL'S CHRISTMAS PRESENT but I can't share it with y'all yet because she hasn't read it I am THE MOST IMPATIENT FOR THIS TO HAPPEN stupid houses with no internet. BUT I THINK IT TURNED OUT OKAY I mention this also because like I have two more plot bunnies alongside the two I still have to write alongside the OTHER two I still have to write and they are all Dragon Age fic. Anyway we haven't unlocked Office on this computer because I hate Office 2010 with a fiery passion and just want my Word 2007 or whatever installed. Whichever one doesn't involve those stupid tabs at the top. This might seem neurotic, but you know, some people have to have unlined paper, others have to have fancy pens, some people like their netbooks, I want my old Word back. IT'S PART OF THE CREATIVE PROCESS, OKAY. I WANT TIMES NEW ROMAN, SINGLE-SPACED, NO STUPID GAPS BETWEEN PARAGRAPHS, THAT IS ONLY FOR THE INTERNET.

oh my goodness, first world problems.

There has been a lot of Bailey's in my life over the past say half of a week, so...lakhen? saba? thīke? IT WOULD HELP IF I KNEW HOW TO SPELL THESE WORDS. I will be back to you with the proper spelling. I'm 90% sure it ends with "saba thīka hai." (Anyone on my flist speak Hindi? Anyone?) (Apparently the alphabet is really easy to learn?) (This is one of my goals in life.)

I think it is time for a new layout. Suggestions? Themes it would make you happy to see every time you wandered over to my journal? I'M TAKING THEM.

Bear:: BABY DO U HAVE A BANDAID
CAUSE I SRAPED MY KNEE WHEN I FELL FOR U
SCRAPED

me: ONOEZ

Bear:: NOT S RAPED

me: I GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE TO LICK IT BETTER TOO
OOPS

Bear:: OMGGGG OH NO U DI'INT

me: OSNAP
MY SALIVA TURNS YOU INTO A VAMPIRE
D:
I ALWAYS FORGET ABOUT THAT

Bear:: OH NOOO
That probably leads to a lot of awkward conversations the next morning

me: yeah
:/

Bear:: worst std ever

me: >sdkjflasdfjad omg yes

Bear:: i mean, penicillin aint gonna cut that
you stuck with that for eternity

me: and you lose your immortal soul in the bargain
awkward

Bear:: also, that whole having to kill people thing

me: the blood sucking

Bear:: how to explain to mom and dad

me: I mean what if you don't like the taste of blood
oh God mom and dad are RIGHT OUT

Bear:: theyre going to be so disappointed
i mean, your grades are going down the potty, no doubt, you cant even GO to class

me: forget college!
forget that corporate career!
how're you going to make a living?
CAN YOU EVEN SUPPORT YOURSELF

Bear:: i guess steal from the people you kill
THATS A PISS POOR FUTURE
LOOK AT YOUR LIFE LOOK AT YOUR CHOICES

me: NOW WRITE AN EMO POEM IN YOUR JOURNAL AND MOVE ON

Bear:: YOU STUPID BITCH

me: SHE'S A STUPID BITCH

Bear:: This has been an Aesop's Tale for our modern times
truly, we can all learn a lesson from this
Dont slut around with vampires

me: <3<3<3
may I share with LJ?

Bear:: PLEASE
everyone needs to know of these perils we face in this, the day of the twihard

me: TRUFAX
AMEN SISTER
PREACH IT

Bear:: BE SAFE
WRAP THOSE FANGS B4 U BITE IT

1) what I don't even

2) lol I am not trying to distract myself with DA fic nosiree not me

image below cut

( seriously, what I don't even )

mostly to tell you that bifemmefatale's daughter has been found, so yay internet and yay finding people!

also apparently it is my bedtime. Oops.

in the meantime, I am mildly obsessed with this song/music video, partly because I find Rihanna's involvement in the song an interesting choice on her part and partly because Dominic Monaghan (OMG HOBBIT) is smokin' and partly because well I kind of like Megan Fox (I have only seen her in Jennifer's Body, which I thoroughly enjoyed, and in which she holds her own), and partly because it feels smart to me, and partly because...idk, the same reason I turned the prompt "katara, games" into this:

it's a hop, a skip, and a jump, stringless puppets and cruel smiles curling in on themselves, blood boiling in one and bending in another, and she picks the teams and makes the rules and sets the limits and she always, always wins, and she hates this game more than any other.

the end.


also last night I had a dream about my boss giving us a lecture, as she is wont to do, and woke up only to go through it again in reality, and another dream about the guy I am consciously getting over but try telling my subconscious that, in which I deeply betrayed his trust, and just wanted to hurl myself into the wall.

just gonna stand there and watch me burn
well that's all right
because
i like the way it hurts

Jade: morrigan
always by herself
...
riordan
uh oh
i just
don't want to have this conversation
at all
Quark: i somehow feel it is quite unavoidable
Jade: oh
shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii



( spoilers of the hilarious kind )

omg Talladega Nights was FRICKIN' HILARIOUS

also now Casablanca is on
mmmm Claude Rains

times i have punched quark in the face: 1
times quark has played "this little piggy" with my toes: 1
times i have discovered twincest fic on quark's laptop for her viewing pleasure: 1
times quark has protested to this post: 1000000000000
♥



EDIT: DAMMIT WHY IS IT THAT AS SOON AS I ACTUALLY START READING BLEACH UPDATES THEY START KILLING OFF THE MAIN REASON I WAS INTERESTED ANYWAY

FRICK

it is epic and awesome though

sob

so today I was grumpy and hungry and tired and having to drive the van and not even sure the van would run/not blow up on me, and I got in and switched on the radio, and lo and behold, what should be playing but

( song one )

and then it was followed by

( song two )

and as if the radio knew I was having a particularly bad day it ended on

( song three )

probably because my radio loves me or something.

okay so after that it was commercials and I switched and ended up hearing this song and went wow, now I feel twelve again, kay.

(my physical therapist and I were discussing songs the other day while I was lying on my stomach trying to convince my thigh muscle to contract and then lift, and she was like "yeah, [song] always makes me think of a bar...where I was the only person under fifty. Yeah, not a good memory." She is adorable and I love her.)

p.s. I should really post graduation pics and update y'all about my life because stuff has happened. One Of These Days.

p.p.s. oil is gushing into the Gulf of Mexico. oil is gushing into the Gulf of Mexico. and I'm eight hours north of it and even I feel neglected. I can only imagine what the people at the beaches feel like.

we have gone from "float on" to the following two songs:





this one has grown on me shut up




why are there no spike fanvids to this song omg